Conspiracy! Card-a-Day #83

Evidence Card 0059: Crackdown

Evidence Card 0059: Crackdown

(CNN)—Military forces in Bulkrapistan attacked protestors in the early morning hours with water cannons, tear gas, and nonlethal rounds in an attempt to disperse tens of thousands of angry citizens occupying the main square of the capital city of Klerdonk.

Troops acting on the orders of Bulkrapistanian dictator Goliol Fersnood moved in to crush the protest movement in its 13th day of civil disobedience and calls for a general strike.  Protestors, who include people from all ages and walks of life, are outraged over the recent enactment of a new law requiring all citizens to wear underwear on the outside of their clothing.

Opposition leader Felmin Snorko was quoted earlier this week, saying, “my boxers are atrocious.  Full of holes.  Stained.  Seriously gross.  No one should see them.  In the name of decency and human rights, this outrage will not stand.”  As of 7:00 a.m. local time, Snorko’s whereabouts were unknown, but his supporters carried on the fight against government forces, throwing thongs and bras at riot police and setting lingerie shops on fire.

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